Stop Searching, Start Attracting

Of all the lessons this one stands out for sure.

I thought opening a yoga business was going to be easy and bring everyone together, yet I experienced competition and division. Each time a teacher would leave or a student wouldn’t come back for class, it would trigger my abandonment trauma.  Was I attracting my own vibe?

I don’t know many people who could’ve persevered through what I’ve been through.

The pandemic led to losing my studio location, losing members and teachers that I love. Many classes fell to zero or just a few students who showed up. There were months where I pulled money from the mortgage of my home to pay my bills to support this business. I’m still standing, I’m still here, I’m still holding space for you.

Initially, I was not able to fully understand how traumas affected me and how they were steering my life.

Let’s get to know the REAL me,

I’ve survived:

  • Abandonment trauma
  • Ongoing Childhood Verbal abuse
  • Extended Childhood sexual abuse
  • Rape
  • Attempted suicide
  • I was strangled and beaten by my ex-husband
  • Sexual betrayal
  • Drugs Alcohol and Rx drugs to numb the pain
  • Severe Depression
  • Anxiety
  • Scattered focus
  • Memory loss
  • Anger
  • Barrett’s disease
  • CPTSD (Chronic post traumatic stress disorder) — is a condition where you experience some symptoms of PTSD along with some additional symptoms, such as: difficulty controlling your emotions,, feeling very angry or distrustful towards the world.

To be crystal clear, it’s day by day. I have to put in the work. Triggers can come from anywhere. Managing them is my responsibility. Yoga has given me the tools to do that.

I don’t think we should hide our traumas. I don’t think we should celebrate them for attention either, but I think publicly acknowledging them so that people understand who we are will open a path for others to heal as well. Survivors of trauma gain emotional intelligence because they see through society's expectation to be happy and secure all the time.  Allow each individual to be themselves, to rise above what’s going on in their mind and open your heart with acceptance.  Don’t shut out people who are going through a hard time.  Reach out and ask what you can do. Hold their hand.  Offer them a shoulder.  We should experience all emotions the good the bad that’s balance. That’s being human.  Mental health needs to be talked about just like physical health.

My gift - healing ❤️‍🩹

My purpose - to open a path for others

Meditation and yoga has allowed me to be aware of my body so that I can help myself before spiraling into trauma reactions.  It starts with morning rituals, daily pep talks, and mindfulness.

Doing yoga with practice, you become free and brave enough to develop to your full potential. You’ll get to learn many new versions of yourself along the way.  It’s been life changing to find this new way of living: a daily practice of meditation and an increased appreciation for the beauty in life.  A deeper more grounded self-respect that isn’t contingent on other people.

By beginning a meditation practice just five minutes a day, you’ll open yourself to attract more joy, resilience and flow in your life.

 

How To Get Started in Yoga?

How do I get started with yoga? That’s been the most common question I’ve received as a yoga instructor. My best answer is to: "Put yoga on your schedule and say no to everything else."
Much like nature, we are supposed to be evolving.
Whether you’re already a yoga teacher, an aspiring yogi or just yoga curious, you've come here because you’re ready for something new.
Claim it!! Allow yourself to take up space in your life with yoga. We only get one life and you have to choose what to do with it.
What class is best for you?
Let’s talk truth!!
It’s difficult to be honest and truthful about what we want when we act through others lens and perspectives.  I encourage everyone to live in truth. I also encourage others to stop taking things so personally and let go of fears and insecurities.  This is what prevents people from doing what they want to do. Explore different ways of seeing things and seeing others' perspective. That’s why I always recommend getting a variety of yoga classes and the reason I don’t like to teach the same class twice. I enjoy taking different perspectives and teaching the same pose in different ways. It allows your body and mind to open up and enjoy a new way of thinking. Take different classes, try new things. Find what resonates with you.
Samkaras are deep grooves within our subconscious mind that put us on autopilot. You could say it’s the awareness or paths in the brain that often lead you to decisions and reactions that you regret or keep you from evolving.  I’ve witnessed a lot of humans have the tendency to reach only for the things that bring instant joy and satisfaction. This means sometimes missing out on a deeper connection and growth. Getting on the mat, and moving your body in ways that you might not enjoy helps create new brain pathways, often referred to as enlightenment.
Getting started is the hardest part and then there will be days you have to remind yourself of your goals.
Even after opening Salty Souls Yoga, there have been days that I didn’t feel like showing up on my mat.   I can recall not following the teachers instructions because my mind was so scattered. Life can be complicated, but the more I did yoga and meditation , the more my mind cleared, my memory sharpened, my body got stronger and all I had to do was keep showing up. If you put yoga and meditation on your schedule and said no to everything else,  your life will transform with your practice.

Where My Yoga Journey Began…

Photo — Circa 2015 This girl did not love herself!!

When this photo was taken, I hadn't been to a yoga class in 5 years! I wasn’t my best self. I was busy growing a successful real estate career, building our family home, saving my marriage and being a mom the best way I knew how. Until I found myself out of alignment and crashing from adrenal fatigue. I hit rock bottom. That is my journey to rediscovering yoga.

Convinced I was building my ideal future, not knowing trauma was steering the wheel, I propelled forward the only way I knew how. It was one thing after another and I didnt have the tools to manage them. I was not eating the foods my body needed, used booze and aspirin to make me feel better, didn’t think I could meditate, spent a lot of time stressing about the things I couldn’t control, shopping to satisfy a hunger for love and attention that I had never received, lonely and unsatisfied.

Yoga saved me! I immersed myself fully. Meditation began to shift my perceptions. I began noticing how certain foods affected my mood and body. I began to control my emotions in a healthy way, my hormones balanced and my intuition grew sharper. Yoga allowed me to re-discover so many amazing things about myself.

I’ve shed so many layers of old conditioning. I now eat what makes me feel alive instead of craving foods that only fed my imbalances. I no longer count calories and I’m the size nature intended bc I put into my body what it needs. Not only has yoga transformed my physical world it has turned my mental world into a garden of self love and healthier habits. I slowly began to notice the things that affected me negatively, behaviors and beliefs that didn’t serve me began to dissolve. Breaking these cycles didn't happen all at once. Yoga was and still is a practice. I show up and do the work. I gave myself permission to let go of unhealthy expectations, own my own shit and set healthier boundaries.  Yoga became the new vehicle but this time I was behind the steering wheel. As my intuition became stronger, I could see the curves on the road before they appear and accurately navigate the road.

Opening a studio with all its many challenges ironically helped me navigate through the phases of my own healing. I love myself and I understand what it feels like to feel that love from others. Not easy, but worth it they say, I know every sacrifice will come back to me times three. This path isn't for the faint at heart and I still wouldn’t change a thing.  I feel not only guided but incredibly supported on this path. Not by humans but spirit/God/universe. Whatever you call it, it doesn't matter, the point is MY back is covered.

Trauma has been shaping our lives for centuries and I think we are the generation to change that! It’s time to take care of our mental health!!  Although Yoga lessens pain, stress and makes you feel pretty amazing, it traditionally has been a path to heighten consciousness and enlightenment. I enjoy incorporating mediation and spiritual practices into each class.

If my story resonates with you and you would like to explore how to access a deeper connection with yourself, heal from the things we couldn’t control, or become a better stronger version of who you are now, I hope you will allow me to be your guide.  My mission is to empower aspiring yogis to develop ways to keep practicing. There is no magic button to push to become a perfect yogi. It takes practice, you have to do the work and be consistent.